Separation Anxiety
by Seravenia Briar Rose
Summary: Ginny misses Draco...might be a oneshot might not
1. Alone

I don't own anything...except for experience

* * *

Other nights it mattered how tired we were or if there was anyone nearby. But not that night. We knew that it was the last night we would have together and we were determined to get the most out of it. We were determined to be one a final time. We didn't know when we would see each other again and that fear of being alone simply helped to further fuel our passion. I knew that you had to go fight in this war, that you blamed yourself far more then you needed. It didn't stop the tears or the fear that you were throwing your life away in a senseless show of honor. The warmth of your body against mine is the one happy memory that helps to keep me sane in the cold nights when I sit alone unable to sleep for the aching. My heart is a cold thing without you around to keep me warm. You were the one who first broke down the shell I had built after Harry left. You made me believe again that I was beautiful and that people could and did love me. I remember the first time and compare it to the last. The awkwardness was overwhelming but that first joining is forever burned into my memory as the first moment I really felt complete. 

That's what it boils down to isn't it? I only feel complete when I'm with you and right now I'm not. That's why I beg you to come home to me every single time we find those stolen moments to talk. I know how dangerous it is for you to contact me. I know you fear that my wards will be broken down by the enemy. You fear that the brand forced upon you by your father would give away my location if you ever returned. You can't and I know that but I still beg and make promises that I could never keep. I know that one day I'll break down your resistance and you'll see that not being with you is killing me. I know that the work you are doing right now is to important to be interrupted for something as small and singular as my wants. Harry would think you were running away from the war. He would never understand choosing love over battle and fame. I know what he thinks of me for staying tucked away in our home. Oh, it was fine for me to stay out of the fight when I "belonged" to him but when I fell for you suddenly I was expected to join the battle.

I also know however that you would do anything to keep me happy and more importantly to keep me safe. All I have to do is convince you that I can't live without you , that my need has become more urgent and you will come back to me. You will and you won't have a choice in the matter. I think that is why I have yet to call in that particular facet of our relationship. I don't like it that you don't have a choice. I don't like it that you are so bound to me in our souls that you would abandon the world to make me happy and you wouldn't even regret it. I wish I knew what spell I had inadvertently cast over you and what one you have netted me with. If I could I would bottle it and sell that love potion.

Then you could come home to me and we wouldn't need to worry any more about money. It wouldn't matter that your family fortune has been used to pay for widows pensions. It wouldn't matter that you can't get a job anywhere because of your last name. We could finish school and live together and have children and be happy. I know that what you want is to be happy, to give the happy childhood that you never received. I wish I could give you that gift. Instead I have already given you the only thing I have to give. Myself.

* * *

AN: So over 100 people have looked at this story so far and no one has reviewed. Even if I did have another chapter already written (which I might) I wouldn't even know if you (readers of the world) wanted it because no one has said anything. I long for costructive criticism because how else am I supposed to know how you feel and what you like? 


	2. In the beginning

-1People say that young love isn't real love. That the first flickering flames of passion simply don't count. I refuse to believe that all of my feelings are fake and shallow. I refuse to believe that the longing that is tearing my heart and soul asunder is false. How can I? How can I allow myself to believe that everything we have gone through for the last three years is fake and meaningless? But that is what they ask me to do, they ask me to turn my back on the one person who has always been there for me. That is one thing I can't do, I refuse to give up on you, on us, on me. I refuse to give up again.

It all started when we were sixteen. You were the Slytherin bad boy and everything my older brothers had ever taught me told me to run away from you. You were a snake it seemed simple enough. It was that night in the Great Hall however that I realized I had never really looked at you before. In that moment it didn't seem right to judge you simply on hearsay without discovering the truth for myself.

After that one glance I had of you I knew that I wanted to be with you. And you, you hid behind your cold ass-hole shell refusing to let yourself believe that any girl could be interested in you. I don't mean that you didn't think they wanted your body. You didn't earn your sex god title for staying locked in your dorm room but you didn't believe that any girl would actually want to know you. I remember I had a date that night and thanks to you it was the worst date of my life. My head was swimming with thoughts of you. The way your voice had sounded, the way you held yourself and managed to turn everything into a joke, just brushing it off.

I knew a couple of kids in Slytherin and luckily for me my brothers weren't in on that little bit of knowledge and I started to use them as an excuse to get near you. Soon I was dreaming of you every night wishing that for once you would look at me and not just see the youngest of the Weasley brood.

And then … you did.


End file.
